3 Weeks

Only 3 weeks left, or 21 days, or 504 hours, or 30,240 minutes, or 1,814,400 seconds... 1,814,399 seconds... 1,814,398 seconds... ok this could go on forever, well not forever, just three weeks.

Alright so I have realized a few things here in the final days of my college experience and for right now I will talk to you about commercials, and at least infomercials! So these commercials come in to my T.V. set around 4:13 A.M. when I am shoving taquitos into my mouth at an alarming rate and chugging Gatorade and water like it is my new life blood. So these infomercials almost always start out the same way, asking the question "are you totally incapable of doing a normal task like wiping your own ass?!" then here is the product for you! This question is asked during a time when a man would be sitting on a toilet with an expression like "this must be impossible for any person to do" all while covered in his own shit wondering how he got this way. Well jerk-off you got that way because you were wiping you ass with a goat and there was no way that could fail. So then comes the product that would be something like a machine. This machine then grabs the correct amount of toilet paper based on the weight you lost while crapping. It calculates this because there is a simple attachment that only takes hours to figure out how to get on the back of the toilet and uses a hand to do what any person could do and wipe your butt. This product is shown spinning around with lights all around it for the low low price that has 6.5 payments that are all 12.37... really simple. They go on to show examples of how happy people are after they have something do what they could do all along.

Overall I just don't like how stupid they make people out to be, we are not incapable of breaking an egg open or incapable of finding our phone in our bag because we are not dumb as rocks. They really do make me laugh but seriously when would you ever try to chop a tomato using a medieval mace, come on buddy that isn't going to work- of course you are going to get sprayed with juice. They will never stop producing these things and I will never stop watching them at all hours of the night and laughing my ass off... an ass that is not being wiped by a goat or man made machine for that matter.

So sorry that this is not a college update but I really wanted to talk about this really quickly. I am sure next time I'll say something about the new Gillette razor that hydrates your face as it shaves, by probably spraying your face with water.

21 days everyone, 21 days to have the most fun we ever will.